Building Healthy Habits and Routines
Small Steps Towards Big Change
Trying to build healthy habits can sometimes feel like chasing this perfect version of ourselves we’re not quite sure how to become. In a world that thrives on urgency and perfection, creating a sustainable and realistic routine can feel overwhelming. We can often think we need to change our entire lives overnight to be “healthy” or “disciplined”. The real transformation happens in the quiet, consistent choices we make every day – not in the massive bursts of motivation.
You set an intention, either writing it down or creating a to-do/checklist, but somehow life steps in with its chaos, exhaustion, or unexpected feelings. Then suddenly you’re back to square one of not knowing where to start. If this sounds familiar, you are not alone. Let’s stop trying to “fix” ourselves through habits – instead create realistic routines that support you, ground you, and feel good and rewarding to follow.
Habits as a Form of Self-Compassion
Building habits isn’t just about structure – it’s about care. It’s about creating small, meaningful steps that help you feel more connected to yourself. Not to be “productive,” but to feel empowered and present. Not to earn rest, but to build a life where rest belongs. When we approach habits through a holistic lens, we’re not just focusing on the behaviors, we are nurturing the mind, body, and spirit in gentle, lasting ways.
1. Start Small and Stay Kind
a. We don’t need to overhaul everything overnight. Start with one small habit that feels good and realistic – even on the harder days. Tie it to something you already do. This isn’t about discipline. It’s about building trust with yourself.
2. Create a Rhythm, Not Rigidity
a. There is beauty in routine, but there is also softness in flexibility. Think of your routine as a rhythm – a dance you get to do with your energy, not a rulebook you have to follow. Maybe your mornings start slow and quiet, with warm tea or music. Or maybe your evenings are your sacred time – journaling with a candle, a break from electronics. You get to design what works for you.
3. Work With Your Nervous System, Not Against It
a. If you ever find yourself freezing, shutting down, or pushing through anxiety or exhaustion – this does not define a lack of willpower. It’s your nervous system asking for regulation.
b. Habits that soother are just as valid and often more powerful than habits that are used to just survive.
Grounding – bare feet on the floor, a weighted blanket, or holding something warm or textured
Mindful Movements – stretching, walking, deep breathing
Emotional Check-Ins – journaling with “What do I need right now?” “How am I feeling right now?
4. Let Rest Be a Ritual
We often think of routines as action-packed, but rest can be just as productive. Routines should support your energy, not drain it.
a. A 10-minute break to breathe and be present
b. A mid-day pause to put your hand on your heart
From Me to You
Routines are personal. They’re not one-size-fits-all. They should feel like little love letters to your future self – not punishments for your present one. If you are in a season where routines feel hard, that is ok. You’re allowed to begin again, in your own way. You’re allowed to build slowly, and you’re allowed to choose softness over shame. You deserve habits that feel like home.
